Stories are the great things. Some stories entertain us, some stories make us laugh, some stories kept us thing, some stories left us empty, even some stories have too much potential to make us cry. Novel culture is vast around the world, and in Japan, the craze of Light Novels insane. Our Winner Mr. Kaustav Medhi has wrote his story in Chapters Format, and this Story named “The Last Letter” is enough to prove why this story is one of winner of our Competition Anitale 2023!
The Last Letter
Chapter 1: Mercy of the Rain
It was a chill evening, where one can enjoy the crackle of the dry leaves with their gentle stomps, and glare at the serenity of the shedding leaves all around. It was the fall.
“I have always liked autumn” said Dave cheerily.
Dave Olson was a bright and intelligent person. You could always see him smiling and giggling. A glance at him could always cheer you up. But, this feeling of tenderness was only experienced if you were a stranger to him.
His world was not very bright, as compared to what you would expect from an average high school student. But there was one factor which was constant in his life, his best friend, Iris Clarke.
“And I have always known that” Iris replied trying to match her best friend’s cheerfulness. She knew that the only time he was truly cheerful was when she accompanied him.
Dave and Iris, they shared a bond which was very complicated, which was often misunderstood by people. They never had any romantic feelings for each other, but deep in their hearts, they truly cared for each other.
For those who knew Dave personally, as a high school student, he was very gloomy. However, he was not to be blamed for his behaviour. The melancholy darkness of his life was the result of allegations, abuse, and things that a child of his age often fails to comprehend. He struggled in making friends and opening up in front of people and had gone through a lot by the time he met Iris.
Iris was loved by everyone. She was caring, kind, and the only person to have trusted and accepted Dave, even when she knew that doing so made others dislike her. She was a very kind person and to Dave, she held a very special spot:
“My world is shattered into pieces, and I am trying my best to reconstruct it. And the pieces I have been able to put together, each of them bears your name, Iris”.
Fall had just arrived but the students in school were already making plans for the most awaited night. It was still 2 months prior to the farewell night at the end of their term. Iris, being the most popular girl, had many boys approach her, seeking to win her over. None of the boys stood a chance for her; not everyone deserved her; but then came a prince who would stake claim at her heart. He did not desire her for the sake of that night rather he wished to accompany her all her life. And when someone approaches you with true love, it often becomes difficult to not accept it.
Dave was happy for her. He loved the fact that someone came in her life that made Iris feel like a queen. But this happiness was short lived. He was enlightened that things were soon going to change. He saw her get distanced from him, and as if their worlds had changed, he would not see her by his side. As he walked down the street bathed with dry orange leaves, he would be bitter, as the only constant he had in his life, would slowly disappear from his eyes.
In this hour of grief, he found her to be happy without him, and hence decided to not bother her. Iris’s absence had a huge toll on him. There was no one who would tell him that it was okay to keep living; that it was okay to try once again. There was no one who would pick him up after his fall, and hence he degraded himself to such an extent that at one point of time, Dave would end up crying
because of the fact that – he was Dave Olson.
Dave had no hope, but he was also no coward. Even though he repented being himself, he promised himself that he would exist, exist till this suffering called –life- would end.
He wondered what happened after death, whether the soul achieves eternal happiness or gets trapped in another cycle of endless sufferings.
And after long, his wrenched heart spoke his innate feelings which would flow out through his mouth, to none other than himself:
“I guess it’s the rain that comforts me.
The merciful rain which gently and calmly hide my tears. It would not stop even if I asked it too. It does not leave me even at my worst. It never makes me feel lonely. I have now realized – it wasn’t the fall that I loved
What I always loved, was the merciful rain”.
Chapter 2: Making A Way Through: Existing
Days went by, very quickly for those who were busy preparing for the most awaited night of their lives. For Dave, however, making his way through each and every day became very exhausting. He would go to school, sit quietly at his desk and tried to avoid people’s eyes. His loneliness for sure disturbed him and his thoughts, but after everything he had gone through, he did not perceive pain. He felt something deep inside him, which was not pain, but another similar feeling that eats each and every ounce of your being, which could not be treated with medicine.
With nothing but emptiness in his heart, Dave would still smile, indistinguishable if natural or fake. He was not strong enough to do this, but this was something he had to do. Something that would enable him to exist among the people at school; something which would give him a warmth to somehow survive the cold nights, despite never being real.
Dave always thought of himself as someone who can easily be replaced. When he saw Iris being happy without him; his heart had assumed in itself that it had finally happened. He was replaced, by his best friend, by someone who he thought could never leave him alone. Accepting this fact, he could not muster up any courage to associate with anyone with being afraid that they would leave at one point of time.
Iris, on the other hand had not replaced him and never intended to. To her, he was still her best friend; she still cared for him just like the old times. But somewhere she felt short of making him feel the same.
Days passed by, nothing changed for Dave, until the end of fall.
By mid fall, Iris had been associating with many of her friends. Their years together were coming toan end and everyone was excited in reminiscing the past. But more importantly, everyone were hyper active in confessing their loves for those who had made their lives better during those years of school, and were much more interested in counting on their amity for the farewell night.
At this time, while talking about a past incident, Iris came to realize that Dave had not been contacting her the way he used to. Tensed about her only best friend, she took herself to Dave and asked him to join her for that day. Dave repeatedly refused and begged Iris to leave him at his condition. But Iris was no less stubborn than him. She held him by the ear and pulled his weak body to her friends. He was humiliated at the way how almost every girl and boy laughed at him.
He knew he would end up being the laughing stock.
He stood quietly while the group chattered and giggled among themselves. Not having the courage to even glance at Iris’s warm and brown eyes. It was late afternoon when the people started leaving for their homes and respective dates. Dave was about to leave for his home but Iris pulled him by his hand and scolded “What is the matter with you Dave? You have been acting strange lately”.
“What is the matter with me? Why does it even bother you? As if you care what’s going on in my life” Dave burst out on her.
This sudden uproar startled Iris but she was hell bent on not leaving his side that day. “Everything Dave, why do you think it does not matter to me? Everything about you matters to me from the day I have known you” she tried to calm him down, as Dave was on the verge of tears.
He tried holding back his tears as much as possible. But without the rain by his side, he could not contain them.
Right at the moment he would weep it all out, a figure came shouting from a distance “Iris! I am so sorry to have made you wait”. Dave wiped his tears and a new thought disturbed him – it was this person for whom Iris was waiting, not for him to present all his negative feelings to her. He might have had been able to stop his eyes from weeping then, but for his heart, it wept as if someone very close had passed away. He wished to run away but for the sake of Iris’s reputation he stayed where he was, looking towards the ground as if to hide his face from this new person, who happened to be one of Iris’s good friend.
Iris hugged her in the most affectionate manner and asked “Oh dear where were you, why are you so late, everyone left already”. The girl eyed Dave and said “I’ll tell you about that later, nothing very interesting”.
Dave was not comfortable being the factor that restricted the conversation between Iris and her friend. He took half a turn to leave, and just before he could complete it, Iris took his hand and gave him a pleading look, to which he could not refuse.
“Dave, this is my childhood friend, Janice Sherman. We have been together for as long as I remember. And Janice this is my best friend, Dave Olson, he is a very nice person”.
Dave nodded as if to greet Janice.
“Dave, Dave, hmm; well my name is Janice, but everyone calls me Jane for short. I guess we can be good friends because, you know, Jane-Dave, Dave-Jane, they match!” Janice said in bright tone.
“I guess we can,” Dave agreed blankly “make good friends”.
After this introduction, Iris let Dave free and he turned to walk home. As he started walking, he had a smile on his face. His smile was turned into real; just like the way dandelions turn white; when a flag of change is triggered. As he walked back crackling the dry leaves, which marked the season he previously loved, he uttered to himself:
“She’s stupid”.
Chapter 3: What It Is: Perception
It was a new day.
Dave hurried to school, driven by an excitement which he could not explain.
That day, only half of the classes were conducted and the second half of the day was free for the students. However, they were asked to help in the preparations for the farewell night, even though it was supposed to commence a month later. Everyone happily volunteered and contributed as much as they could towards the preparation.
Dave would feel uneasy with others and hence he decided to stick with Iris.
Iris was accompanying her friends in the decorating the entrance, the entrance to school’s playground; which would end up in being the entrance to one of the grandest night of their lives. Dave was helping Iris, but she noticed him to be a little different. He was never absent minded in working, but on that day, to her surprise, his mind was not on what he did.
She gave him a friendly push and asked him if it was someone who drew all his attention. He had a muffler on, and tried to hide his face but the smile that came on his face, could not be hidden. Before Iris could dig deeper into her best friend’s secret, she was surprised by a shriek form behind. It was Janice.
“ehehehehehe” Jane giggled.
“You scared me! Huh, that was so close to getting me fainted, you know that?” Iris uttered this as if to scold her, but she was as sweet as ever. Jane, still giggling, started to tickle Iris. Iris laughed so hard that she ended up scattering every dry flower she had in her hands. Dave took down to his knees to pick up the flowers, when Jane greeted him “Dave” she smiled and continued “why didn’t you laugh at Iris crying her eyes out? Or is it that I look like so trash that you cannot laugh in my presence?”
Dave could only blankly look at her. He hadn’t been greeted this way since a very long time and did not know how to reply. “It is not that way, you know, I-” he started, but Jane interrupted him “its fine. I will not be talking to you again. Hmph”
Dave grew tense about the fact that he might have just hurt Jane, and the part of his face not covered with the muffler showed it. At this, Jane burst out laughing and so did Iris, and when Dave realized it was a prank, he too, laughed.
The trio had just finished laughing when Iris had to leave as she had to spend some time with Mike, her prince. She ‘handed’ Dave over to Jane for the rest of the day and promised to meet them at the end of the day. Jane happily took over the responsibility of decorating the entrance and to ‘look after Dave’. Dave found her to be a very friendly person and did not get worked up about this. Neither did he complain nor did he feel any urge to leave for home; and possibly looked forward to helping Jane.
It was a surprise.
Dave quietly helped Jane with her work. But after some time, Jane grew uneasy and she blurted out “oh man, why are you so boring, you have a beautiful girl working with you and you are not even interested in starting a conversation. Do I scare you to that extent that you don’t even wanna talk to me? Or do I look like toxic emo teen who will judge you for anything you say? Goshhh, just ask me
something already”. Dave was caught off guard and he stared at her thinking what to say or what can be asked. Atlas, he asked Jane “from when do you know Iris?”
She was immediately filled with content to have broken the silence and replied “Iris and I are childhood friends. It’s actually been quite long we know each other. But we lost contact until recently we started talking again. And to your surprise, she told me about her best friend, she described him as a boy who was caring and warm and a very nice person, I assumed she was talking about you. What about you? Since when do you know Iris?”
“Well it’s been quite a while. She was my first friend and the only one to have never left. She’s the only one friend I have-” he spoke but again, Jane interrupted him as quickly as a bolt of lightning “one friend? What do you mean? Where the hell am I dying? Oh, I guess I am too annoying for you to consider me your friend? You sure are mean Dave”. “It’s not like that- you got it all wrong. Sorry. It’s more like I don’t think anyone except Iris can ever think of me as a friend. So-” he shared his feelings; for the first time with someone who was not Iris. “I don’t know about anyone else, but I do, alright? Don’t you dare put me in the same league as everyone” she giggled again and added “I am special”.
“You sure are” uttered Dave, in a low voice which only he could hear.
“Why is it that you feel that way? Is it also the reason you are always so quite?” questioned Jane. Usually, Dave would not be comfortable to open up but, Jane, she was truly special. He found in himself the need to tell everything that troubled his mind, made his heart empty to Jane but he tried to suppress that urge, and summed it up as “I am a failure”.
“I am afraid I don’t know what that word means” Jane smirked “Mind elaborating it a little?”
Dave let out a sigh. He was not disturbed or sacred or uncomfortable, he was shocked. No one bothered about him, but there was this person who wished to lighten up his burden, and started in a soft voice
“I don’t have people; family, friends or relatives, with whom you usually share your day to day feelings, your sufferings. In this twisted world, I am vanishing slowly and I wonder if someday after I am gone, someone will even think of me”. Jane was disturbed by his words, it was as if they hit her personally, but her smile did not wear off. She questioned him what he did for expenses and he coldly replied “The court collects the monthly expenses from my parents, and an officer would hand them over at the beginning of every month”.
“So you stay alone? I am sorry to say but that’s pretty cool and aren’t you scared? Oh! Can you cook? Oh my god, that makes you so cool” she put up a string of questions excitedly and Dave could do nothing but answer her silly questions. “Umm. Yeah. But I kinda suck at cooking”.
The decorations were forgotten, as the two went on with their conversation. Dave was enjoying such a conversation after many years. It was long, never ending and most importantly, he saw that Jane was excited. He wished he could keep this conversation going.
“Oh, it’s been quite late, I may need to leave” Jane realized as she saw the sun set far away. Dave assured her “Well I will complete the decorations and then head home too, no worries. See you next time then?”
“Next time” Jane said winking at Dave and then ran away towards her home, as believed by Dave. The moment she left, he started feeling uneasy, as if, as if he missed her. It wasn’t minutes since she left and he could hear her voice “Dave! Dave!! I forgot to ask you something”. He thought about how warm she looked when she said “next time” and wished that the time would come sooner. But that ‘time’ came way sooner than he expected.
He could see Jane running back to him; as she stood in front of him, while struggling to catch her breath she asked him “Why is it that, you never started fresh with someone new?”
That question seemed to put an arrow through his heart. That particular question, as if, had stopped his functioning for a fraction of a second. He started “I- I- never found someone. Even if I did, I feared that they would not be able to hold on to me the way Iris did. More so, I never wished to start fresh, I felt that if I did, I would invalidate my past self and his sufferings. I don’t wish to erase him-“
“You are wrong!” Jane interrupted Dave yet again, “you won’t be invalidating your past self. Your past self is the same as you Dave, who can never be erased. If you start fresh, you will invalidate those things that made you feel replaceable, and trust me Dave, the feelings that made you feel such, is what are truly invalid” she came down on him. It was a judgement which seemed to have deeply affected Dave.
Thinking that she hurt his feelings, she hugged him tight and left without speaking a word. But in reality, she did not made him feel bad about being himself, She made him feel something he had never felt.
Looking at someone who made him believe this feeling existed, who helped him to perceive it, know what it is, he uttered
“It was… no, she was…warm”.
Chapter 4: What It Is: Different Meanings
To Iris, it was an emotional roller coaster. To anyone else, it was just another day, at the end of which they will be a day closer to the farewell night. It was winter by then, but what made Iris grow cold, was the realization of her the chaos that awaited her friends’ lives.
That day, Dave came running towards her, in an out of the world excitement. He had something in his heart, which ended up haunting Iris’s every being.
Iris was sitting in the gallery of the football ground, the least of all places she could have been found. Dave had been looking all over for her. And at last when he saw her, he ran at his fastest pace towards her, and to her surprise, had a fall. Iris was worried if he had hurt himself, but was relieved when she saw him get up laughing.
His laugh was as bright as the morning sun.
“Iris! I want to tell you something” he said, still giggling. He expected Iris to share his excitement. Iris on the other had wiped from her cheeks, what Dave thought were tears. On a normal occasion, he would ask her what had happened, but today he knew what he wanted to tell her, would make her happy. “Yes please, tell me Dave”.
“Well, you know….I…..love someone”
“Whatttt!? Who is it!?” Iris screamed, it was not excitement, she was afraid. There was something which bothered her, and there was one name she did not want it to be. But her fears were valid for Dave was in love with none other than “Jane”.
Iris’s brown eyes went dull. For a moment she could not see anything but she did not lose her composure, and for the first time in all the years, Iris discouraged him for something he chose.
“It can’t be Dave, it is not love you just met her a few weeks ago. I don’t think its love. You just found a friend and misunderstood your happiness to be love. It can’t be Dave, she can’t be-” she was on the verge of crying, but Dave, would not waver. “It is, Iris, she is the one. I know it and I am sure I am not mistaken”. “How can you be so sure?” she argued, “Because I felt it with my heart” he concluded. Iris came to realize that her acting strangely would disturb him so she tried to calm down. “So tell me Dave, what do you think love is? Do you know what it truly means? Are you aware of its true meaning?”
“Iris, to me, love has different meanings, they keep changing. But for argument’s sake if I were to tell you what it meant to me, it would be-
The definition of true love – is that in the process of recognizing someone else’s kindness, associating your happiness with them, in the process of loving them with all your heart,
You attain the ability to love yourself”
This broke her heart into a million pieces. She felt helpless. Her friend finally had found someone to help him ease his life; who could teach him to live, not just exist in this world. But she cursed her fate, for this time, she had to degrade his emotions rather than encouraging him.
“Dave, what if she found her meaning of true love with someone else? I am sorry to say, but there’s already someone who she is in love with, someone else”. This should have torn Dave’s heart apart, and he should have dropped the matter right then and there. But that was not the case:
“If she finds it with someone else, we can’t help it, but I also don’t think that I require her to love me back. Because when you love someone, and expect them love you back, it is not love but selfishness”
Iris stood no chance against him.
She had to be the heartless one this time, as if it was determined by destiny.
Earlier that morning took place the conversation between Jane and Iris, which set Iris up in this situation.
Iris was sitting in her seat near the window when Jane asked her to accompany her to the playground, and something was off about her. The burden she was carrying had to be relieved, as she had one last thing she had to do.
“I am sorry to be bringing this up all of a sudden, Iris, but it is important. I need a favour from you, and you are the only one I can count on. But first, here, have a look at them” Jane handed Iris what seemed to be medical reports. When she was sure that Iris read all of it, she said in a soft tone “I won’t be there for long”.
Iris’s eyes flooded with tears as she realized she would see her for the last time. The reports clearly mentioned it and what stopped her heart was the smile on Jane’s face. The last time, she would ever see it. She hugged her tight while weeping at her shoulders and sobbed “how can I help you?”
“Only you can help me dear friend. It’s about him, Dave.
You remember the day when you introduced me to him? Well, ofcourse you do. I found him to be someone similar to me, and that day when I talked to him, I came to know he could not fake his happiness, like I do and that he had already given up.
I tried to help him, as long as my body allowed me to, but the reports say it won’t hold very long. I really wished I could be there for him when he needed me” she sobbed, but she didn’t let her strength give up “He is trying, Iris, and I truly believe that someday he will be able to walk with his shoulders high up, and be the person I wanted him to be. I won’t be able to look at him that way, but can you do it on my behalf when the time comes?”
Iris was speechless. She did not know what to say, her mind was blank. She hugged her as if she would never let her go and cried. “I don’t know what he would be without you, but I promise you that I will not leave his side till that day comes” she cried out harder than ever. Jane comforted her.
And when she was done crying, Jane had to leave. But Iris had one last question for her
“By any chance, do you love him?”
Jane, who was hiding her own tears while walking away from the school, turned with her most beautiful smile and raised her shoulders up and down, and continued walking. Iris would cry seeing her friend for the very last time as she vanished both from her sight and her life.
“Dave, your love is true, but I am so sorry to say” she cried again “why did it have to be me who
would tell you this, I am sorry to say that you will never see her again, because the only place she exists now, is in our memories”
Dave stood there, thunderstruck, with no expression on his face.
After some time, when his mind had regained to ability to understand, he stared at the ground with his hair covering his eyes,
And Smiled.
Chapter 5: The Last Promise
“It was the night of the dance.
The students, who previously did everything together, were all present in one place for one last time. All of them, except you.
The gathering started with everyone making their grand entrances one by one, which were followed by cheers and ovations. Everyone was dressed in their best formal attire, everyone looked gorgeous. So did he. I could hardly believe he was there to attend the night even though he knew you will not be there. His eyes were not cold, neither was his behaviour. He looked warm. My best friend, was right in front of me, and what amazed me was that he was a completely different person. I wanted to reach out, as I would on any normal day, but then, I just couldn’t get over the fact that he was there despite your absence.
People were enjoying themselves, so was I. In these hours I would casually steal a glance at him and he would be acting just as though nothing had happened. Talking to friends, enjoying drinks, participating in games, talking of the past; I wondered if your existence was forgotten by him. I was glad that he could do this, but it made my heart cold with contempt because he claimed that his life was not complete without you, and here he was proving each and every promise he made in his heart to be a lie, a deception. It was the first time I had nothing but hate for him.
The night was a fabulous one. Everyone seemed to be at their best, with their respective partners, and their mates whom they would meet for the last time. And the most awaited moment came, when the music would flow into the mist of that gloomy night.
Every male took hold of their partners and in the most polite and gentlest manner danced with them as if they were dancing with their queens. I too was drowned in the eyes of mike, whom you knew very well, the love of my life, had his hands on my waist and I would match his movements with my hands on his shoulders, the shoulders which I knew would one day carry the responsibility of being my man.
In the charm of the night, I totally forgot about him, and when I rolled my eyes to have a glance at him, I saw, not the man who I hated for that night, not my best friend, but the man he was always supposed to be, the man who you wanted to see. What I saw, can never be taken away from me.
He was trembling, as he walked into the middle of the arena. And suddenly, gesturing as if he were holding someone’s waist, started to dance. Many of the students and their partners stopped dancing to look at what had happened, so did me and mike, but he did not. He danced, as if he were dancing with the person who pulled him out of the darkness. He danced, as if he were being looked in the eye by the person he held so dearly with his hands. He danced, as if he was dancing with the person who was the embodiment of love for him. He danced, as if we were dancing with you. For him, you were present every moment in that night. All the hate that gathered in me came out in the form of tears as I realized something I should have earlier – that he could always see you. He saw you with his closed eyes which overflowed with tears, and a smile which was wider than anyone else’s. He saw you he really did and made sure you were seen by us. He gave us the opportunity see you, one last time.
He demonstrated to me, what love was truly capable of.
I knew deep inside he was suffering, it was the fact that he could never get over your absence. His heart could never forget you, and yet he felt your presence and your love each and every hour of his life from that day onwards, from that very moment he came to know from me that you were not going to be in his life.
I can neither thank you nor repay you for the change you brought in him. You lighted up his world in the dark times, and pulled him out of the swamp of dejection. I wish you were here living your life with us, with him.
We can’t change what was inevitable, but what we can do is carry you in our hearts for a long time. However, at some point of time, we may forget about you, but there is one thing which I can promise you, which would also be my last promise to you, Jane.
We may fail to keep you in our hearts forever, but he never will. You will always live in his heart.
Your dear friend,
Iris”
Written By,
Kaustuv Medhi
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